THE TEARS WERE MINE

Yesterday I received the best email yet  from a stranger I feel quite at home with. It went as follows:

Eva darling, 

I will spare you the annoyance of formality for I know you are me refracted through a different prism. I know you love to rubbish formalities. You are a rebel with a cause, a wild soul in love with the untamed. I love you the stranger I feel most at home with. (LOL)

Before I forget, I want to thank you for the tears. Moshi was so much fun with you! What lazy pricks we are! God bless your fun side. No, God bless your geek side even more! Ever met a girl that switches between being the life of the party to a boring philosopher and then minutes later switches up to a motivational speaker? Of course not, you don’t own a mirror! Hahaha.. I thank you for the tears.

Yo hugs are the best. You have a rich soul and that is because you give pieces of it to drunk emotional girls at the brink of jumping off the ledge. I hope you reach out to the brothers as well time to time. Eva, I thank you for the tears. 

My wells had run dry and I was numb inside. As I told you the story of my life you sobbed like a little girl, a weak woman, vulnerable and utterly human; that is when I knew how strong a lady you are. I thank you the tears. 

You listened without interrupting..except for the a million sniffs.. girl, didn’t you sob? You spoke without judging, and when you laughed you laughed like a girl on top of the world. Not because you have it all, but because you know the much you have could be taken away too, you said. A girl with no sense of entitlement! I thank you for the tears. 

Your words Eva, those ones made my one week in Moshi a life-changing experience. Those mere intangibles gave me life. Whenever I saw your lips moving I was guaranteed of either coming alive with encouragement or death by laughter. I never knew how much I’d come alive and die by listening to you! I thank you for the tears. 

Well, I miss you so much. Yesterday I remembered when you told me, “Let me break your heart and collect the pieces, just so I can crush them into powder, blow them into the wind and yell: Marisella you’re now freeee!” Hah, I love your sense of humor and your lust for freedom. So as we wander on, country after country, city after city, may we find more strangers and give them tears to thank us for. But most importantly may we always find a way to reunite..each time as a stranger still! That sense of freedom that sets hearts ablaze and engulfs them within. That caring gesture that lets them know there is power in vulnerability as you always say.You were the first to ever read me a book and give it to me as a souvenir. You’re my many firsts. You gotta stick with me now. I thank you for the tears. The tears you shed. Can’t wait for our next adventure, dear sister I never had.

P.S: The tears were mine.”

Now, I don’t know if I am the only person with the habit of bonding with strangers. But I am sure it is not the worst adventure at all. So, dear Marie, I shared this amazing mail from you so you know it moved me to tears.. I know you’ll claim the tears were yours..hahah, but that is fine with me. And I shared it so I reach out to people like you and I who are in love with vulnerability, people who have learned to ditch the fairy-tale for the human-tale. People who read out books to strangers  just so they can make the day a little more bearable. I shared this email so I can inspire people like you and I to reach out to other people and give them a hug every once in a while, because the world is full of persons in need of a smile and a hug. The invaluable treasures. To all the random friends we made along the way…to the strangers we sit side by side during those flights or even long train/bus rides, the ones we have told our secrets and they told us theirs but for some reason we never asked for their names or even contacts, to the ones who let us have the window in the plane (Hi Thomas! Thank you 🙂 )  to all the strangers we converted into our “street family”, this is for you.

Dear Moshi, Tanzania, thank you for Marisela! The “stranger” I feel most at home with!

And in the words of Charlotte Eriksson, “I am a free soul, singing my heart out by myself no matter where I go and I call strangers my friends because I learn things and find ways to fit them into my own world. I hear what people say, rearrange it, take away and tear apart until it finds value in my reality and there I make it work. I find spaces in between the cracks and cuts where it feels empty and there I make it work.” 

I make it work. Let’s all make it work 🙂

Author: Mbula Nzuki

Lover| Lawyer| Lifelong Learner| Writer| Traveler| Investor| Ambivert| We seek outside the wonders we carry inside us ~ Rumi. View all posts by Mbula Nzuki